There was once a hero who went by the name of "butsecks69" who was known all across the land of Runescape as the greatest fighter who had every roamed the land.
He had slain every type of beast in exsistence, from the lowly rabid chicken in heat, to the fearsome black dragons that were jacked up on metapause.
He had also proven his skills in the dreaded wilderness, slaying servants of the dark lord, such as "nehgurfuker", the dreaded knight who made his earnings by molesting small 13 year old boys.
It was Butsecks69 who decapitated pupybalz, the treacherous scammer who made a living scamming what he called "stupud n0b f4g5".
But there was one thing that butsecks69 had never encountered, and that was love.
Oh sure, he had his fair share of girl friends, such as "autofuk321", and "sk4t3r gurl" (she didn't really count though, as she wasn't really a girl...).
But that's not the love I'm talking about.
You see, although butsecks had his fair share of bitches, he had never actually stuck his hoo-ha dilly in a girl's cha-cha.
Butsecks69, the greatest fighter in all of runescape, was a virgin.
Some say that he is a faggot.
Others say he doesn't even know what sex is.
In the end, he was still a virgin.
nobody knows why exactly he is a virgin after all the years he's played.
Most people assumed that he had lost his virginity to autofuk321, do to the fact that she could be heard saying "oh god, fuck me harder you dirty pig.
Oh OH OH GOD YES YESSSSS POUND MY FUCKING ASS YOU BASTARD" over and over again on a regular basis.
Little did people know, that the day butsecks69 lost his virginity would mark the begininning of a dark era for Runescape, that would be forever known as "The rape of Runescape"
One day butsecks69 was out cutting wood to sell on the gold exchange.
Suddenly, a wood nymph appeared out of nowhere and attacked him.
Despite the fact that the wood nymph was lvl 99999, butsecks didn't run.
He never ran from a fight.
The battle lasted for hours, and near the end, butsecks noticed that his "pee pee hose", as he called it seemed to be developing rigor mortis.
He wasn't the only one who noticed this.
The nymph looked down, and screamed.
Before he could even blink, the nymph took off running.
butsecks, who wasn't a merciful killer, took off after the nymph, his pee pee hose still rigid.
The nymph tripped and fell flat on its face.
Butsecks, unprepared for the nymph's sudden fall, tripped over the nymph, and fell not onto, but INTO the nymph.
The nymph screamed in horror, but Butsecks just stood there, transfixed by the sudden wave of pleasure that washed over him.
After a few seconds, instinct and the "skills of the trade" learned from puberty took over.
He began to thrust foward and backward.
His mouth hung open in a retard grin, and his eyes had rolled up to look at the sky.
The nymph had gone silent, amazed that she couldn't feel anything, due to butsecks' short dick.
After Butsecks had finished, the nymph laughed at him and pointed at his short dick before running away.
Butsecks took no notice of this.
Instead, he sat on a tree stump, contemplating his new found discovery.
He had perfected every skill known to man in Runescape, but here was a new one.
He briefly wondered if he would be rewarded a sexy new cape if he raised his sex skill to 99, like with the other skills.
"Well" he thought, "There's only one way to find out."
He started off small, fucking chickens, imps, cows, and goblins.
After that, he moved on to bigger things such as guards, skeletons, and zombies.
He didn't just fuck monsters and NPCs either.
If there was a fish or a bucket of water lying on the ground, chances are that that item had been fucked by Butsecks69.
After months of fucking items and npcs, he decided it was time to move on to more.
Not even muff diving with dragons could satisfy him.
He took his new found ability to the wilderness, where he performed PFP (Player fucking player) on a regular basis.
During this time, there were a couple of new tips you had to follow to escape the wilderness with your asshole the same size it was before.
1. Don't bend over. Even if there were 2000 party hats lying right there, you should never EVER bend over to pick them up.
Kneeling wasn't much better, as you were exposing another weak point (specifically, the ear canal.)
2. Watch out for a guy running around without any clothes.
Chances are that it is either him, or one of his victims. If it's his victim, he might be nearby.
3. Butsecks69 started his own clan called "The players of runescape" and they raid the wilderness on a regular basis, so it'd be best to stay out of multi combat areas.
Eventually his reign of molestation was ended by a girl who went by the name of "shittytits".
Shittytits filled her vagina wih razers and then travelled to the wilderness.
When Butsecks attempted to fuck her, he received severe lacerations all across his genitals, and died a few miles away from where he had sustained the wounds.
